There are a lot of different people in this world who identify differently regarding their gender. Some people are born as male or female and identify their gender as the gender they were given at birth. Some are born as a female and identify as a male or are born as a male and identify as a female. Some people are nonbinary or genderfluid- meaning they don’t really identify as solely a male or a female. No matter the case, it is important that we avoid assuming a person’s gender.
As a society, we have heard a lot of stereotypes and have set certain “expectations” for what a male should/should not do and what a female should/should not do. Examples include: girls wear dresses, girls like the color pink, girls like to wear makeup, girls have their hair long, boys like the color blue, boys wear pants and basketball shorts, boys don’t wear makeup, boys don’t paint their nails, etc. We should try to steer clear of stereotypes like this. We may look at someone on the outside and make observations about their dress, their hair, and how they look. From those observations, we assume their gender. Everyone does this- do not feel bad if you do this! However, we should all strive to do better. There is much more to a person’s gender identity than just their appearance.
If you are unsure what a person’s gender identity may be, that’s okay! The best thing to do is just ask them their name. It might even be helpful to introduce yourself and share your preferred pronouns so they know how you identify. But, if they don’t give you their pronouns, that’s okay! Avoid asking them questions like “So, are you a boy or are you a girl?”. If they introduce themselves to you without sharing their preferred pronouns, just refer to them by their name!
Gender Identity #3
By yourself or with a partner, read the following scenario and discuss the follow-up questions.
You are riding the bus home from school and your friend comes over to sit by you for the ride. They tell you that they have a friend named Blair who has been their good friend for years. Blair recently came out and has since gotten a different hairstyle and changed the way they dress. Your friend then asks you if Blair coming out means Blair identifies as a different gender now, too?
>What would you say to your friend? What advice would you give them in this situation?
>Sometimes people think that if a person comes out as gay and they start dressing differently, it must mean their gender identity is different now that they’ve come out. This is not entirely true. Sometimes when someone comes out, they share their gender identity and/or their sexual orientation. Sometimes, it’s just one or the other. A change in the way some dresses could mean someone identifies with their gender differently OR it could also just mean they wanted to change up their wardrobe.
Download Learn More About: Assuming A Person’s Gender (English) here.